Tag Archives: Kevin Youkilis

Call to the Pen: Is Kevin Youkilis Too Sweaty to be a Yankee?

youk_sweat

The Question: Kevin Youkilis too sweaty to be a New York Yankee?

The Process: A whole lot of ham-fisted prose and thesaurus words and Wikipedia information.
_____________Occasional joke attempts.

The Answer: It wasn’t a real question.

Please click this internet hyperlink to read the entire post over at Call to the Pen

 It starts at the temples, pools and spreads across the forehead. Once volume meets critical mass, surface tension takes over, and the liquid begins to travel outward, onto the brim and then to the tip of the bill. The perspiration converges, multiplies, drips. Drips a lot. More so when present on a batting helmet, the wool absorbancy of the the on-field cap no longer an obstacle. This is the sweat of Youkilis, the excretion of a Red Sock, the sudor of a heathen. Greek God, pshaw! This is not the way of a gentleman Yankee.

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Call to the Pen: On Playing Baseball in the Summer’s Heat

It’s less hot today than it was yesterday and the day before thank God and please click this internet hyperlink to read the entire post over at Call to the Pen

I do a lot of armchair, never-played-the-game type analysis. I look at baseball numbers and baseball people and what they say and do and try to make arguments and reach conclusions and I do all of this from the comfort of my own home. I don’t get out and rub the dirt and smell the socks or whatever it is clubhouse access and/or prior professional baseball experience allows one to know and do. I just sit here at my computer like an idiot and type words with my smooth, uncalloused, and delicate fingers. Lately, the aforementioned comfort of my aforementioned home has been compromised, because it’s really, really hot outside and it’s making life terrible. And while I don’t believe I’ve ever sat up here on my previously cool and well ventilated Internet High Horse, casting down judgement on weak players expiring under the unforgiving heat of the sun’s merciless rays, I now pledge, here, before you, Nature, Pyrios, Aeos, Aethon, and Phlegon, to never do so in the future.

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