NotGraphs Material: The Heath Bell Oil Boil

I started this modest baseball blog one day for reasons that I’m still unsure of. A creative outlet for a dormant writer, his brain and ability slowly withering away like some old, shitty corpse? Yes, that was one reason. Dreams of fame and fortune? Obviously. And despite a great deal of tangible evidence pointing towards this being a futile waste of time, I’m still here, writing these goddamned words and worrying about them. Beats me.

But behold, a light! I’ve mentioned NotGraphs here before and I shall do so again. NotGraphs is my Zihuatanejo. It is a warm place with no memory. Talented baseball writers craft posts there. The posts are about silly things. I myself write silly things about baseball so it seems I’m currently half-way towards fulfilling the criteria of the place. Perhaps one day.

The other day I partook in some nonsense and did some Photoshopping. It was concerning something Dayn Perry had said on a podcast about Heath Bell needing to shut his fat face, lest he be boiled in a large vat of oil, and with cause. I wrote some words and I had my fun and the day went on just like any other. Today, that image and a link back to this blog has graced the fine pages of NotGraphs.

I can honestly say that this is the current pinnacle of my time spent blogging on the internet about baseball. Jesus Christ, I just read the previous sentence and it was not intended to sound nearly as depressing as it does. At any rate, had I known this image and its origins were to be bestowed upon the clamoring masses, I definitely would have tried a little harder and done a better job. Then again, the same can be said for literally every single thing I do.

But it did happen.

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